Monday, May 21, 2007

she...is just another person in the crowd
& just like any other person in the crowd..
she gets pushed around..a lot. and a lot.
and a lot more.
time makes sure everything changes...faces disappear
and new ones appear, to haunt her existance
but she...is to stay
until she's seen everyone and everything pass her by
with time mocking her mute cry

far too many times...has she seen
'friends' turning 'strangers'
too much of pretence...to many goodbyes
sick and tired of the cruel life..she keeps
getting pushed around...


catches sight of people and faces
she thought she once knew....
the childhood best friend , flaunting his new piercing
and showing off HIS [fake] pictures....
the kind old lady ...who made her believe in angels
and in between, her dreams [of swimming through the stars]
swimming across her brain..
which makes her look at life with disdain
chasing after sweet fantasies which keep her from
facing the reality..the dreams which
disappear in a moment
or get stolen by some malicious bastard in the throng
and again...she gets pushed along
with the silence within her drowning
the vociferations of the crowd
the loneliness slowly and steadily
annihilating her soul..
but nothing makes a difference really..does it?
in the end..its all going to be like its going to be
the void that now is..will remain
..getting pushed around is just
a part of the game she's learnt to lose

and then.
they bang into each other.

a pretty stranger..
just another face in the crowd, was he?
look at each other..their glances meet...
share a few words..a few smiles
a few dreams...a few wierdly amusing fantasies..
he gives her his thoughts..she gives him her song
just two different people in the throng
the perfect strangers' meeting...like nothing could go wrong
they serve as muse for each other
somehow it does matter..he says
it does matter..?she prays it were true
and before she knew it..she had sold her soul
to his heart of gold...for dreams,
the far fetched dreams..that deep down she knew
were never to come true
..and as this thought eats up her mind..
she asks him to look away
'but dont you want me to stay?'..he asks...
but she does know her life only too well
full well does she know
..that their fates,someday,will do them apart

and sure enough..
next moment he runs into another pretty stranger
forsaking her .. quitting the game
..for a stranger with a different coloured iris...
a different sounding name..
she watches the two disappear
hand in hand..
and she has no one to blame

and once again
she's just another loner in the crowd..
with nothing to save..nothing to lose..



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thats something i had wroted way back. like around 2 months back?
i guess. or maybe three or maybe four
it couldnt be more...haha i just felt like posting this and another and another maybeh.
xD
and blew eez a naice color. veary veary. =].

2 comments:

little boxes said...

yes i agree...it is a nice colour
;)
but above all...this is a nice post

weevil girl said...

i cant work on it anymore.
it was just too much to even put this to writing. i normally wouldnt have bin so open, but i did need a vent then. hahajh;
but thats that. ive written it, and now i wanna forget that i ever felt any of it.holding on to anything seems foolish now. now that ... gah i give up explaining.