I fall asleep earlywith half my stationery around my head, socks on the window sill, grip at the edge of a waking dream. What has this done to me- i wake up with a start at 4:44 AM to look for your words stuck somewhere in the telegraph line, hanging like pigeons dead from the shock of a spark,letters in a puddle hidden from sunlight.When i am in love with you, i am always pulling down my cheeks, i quibble about the way you love, i smell my shoes in my sleep. I'm taking too many showers, im taking too much time to listen to a song, im taking too little into consideration and too much to heart.
When i am in love with you, i want to know that im getting flowers next time.My head sticks out the window and there's nothing coming to kill me.I cry too much and too little, i smile like it's a daydream.
I am a naked heartbeat, let it not be a daydream.
thats something i wrote when i was very high and would not have left the depths of my gay purple journal under normal circumstances. i just found it two days back,and i dont have any memory of having written it.but its here because you should know and because i want to fix things.
so there is a love so strong that you mostly tend to love all wrong because its just too much.