iThings

"I is the bit of ultimate truth in the eternal lie(or was it the other way round?) we keep telling ourselves until we reach the enlightnment of our soul."
~Swami Confuzzledspiritanand on I.

"There can only be 1 I and 1 and I look similar to the eye."
~ a wannabe poet on I.

"U thinks.Therefore I dont."
~I on I.


I, the topic of today's post, happens to be the ninth letter of the alphabet. This alphabet.
The one I am using and n0+ th3 oN3 u l3!k t0 typ3 !n d00d!!!!11
I rule(s) the world and what lies beyond and is the greatest mystery Detective U Gond is yet to unravel. But there is no 'I' in 'rule' because the two words don't go very well together. They have antonymous tendencies. From the beforetheprevious sentence we infer that I is also a WORD which may be used as a sentence [legally] after the legal consultance of your spouse's lawer (because according to polpularNOT belief, there is no I after marriage , there is only We[this mysterious transformation of I into We, however, is not very observable in modernday, or unmodernday marriages, therefore i diregard the claim]), unless you were planning a divorce.

In the alphabet, I appears between the bulky H and J who, very cunningly, undermine all I's efforts to gain weight .

"I has a beautiful figure most worthy of entering the competition."
~ the organizer of Miss AlphabetOfWorldLanguages on I.

For this reason, I's most annoying relatives sometimes consider her to be suffering from malnutrition. I is also a pronoun, which is used by the speaker to refer to himself/herself.
This usage of I, however, raises many controversies, and some argue that the use of the slimandsexy pronoun 'I' to refer to oneself must be restricted to the non-obese population of the society, which otherwise projects a very misleading image of the speaker [which is not the case here, rest assured ;D]


Facts on I:

... I has a crystal ball for a brain which looks like a translucent pancake.
... I rocks everything including your dirtysmellysocks.
... there is no I in dumb but there IS u in it
... therefore U and Dumb go very well together but I dont
... I can smell rotten pumkins from 78 miles away
... no, it was 87 miles
... no it may be more but who cares but U
... and I does not care about what U cares so GAH!
... U is jealous of I's amazingness and is conspiring its murder
... which I is aware of
... and I has a better counterattacktheory which U knows not of so mwahahahahjhjhjh!!!
... and evil laughs make I's day
... so do colours- multicoloured colours, black and white colours, and transparent colours.
... I is Noitcefrep spelled backwards
... I is going to write a dictionary where 'spelled' will be under the section of 'Words U takes ages to grasp'
... I is the first letter in 'interesting ' and without I, interesting would have to change its definition
... there is an I right in the middle of Pig, therefore, I and Pig really really get along (greedy or otherwise) and I is not ashamed of it, I takes pride in their fransip
... I uses the word fransip so that U's fat head can register the meaning of the word friendship faster than it otherwise would
... I is fond of evisceration and also chopsticks
... and also of nearly legless butterflies XD
... I is Eve's incarnation!!
... no no I lied!!
... yes yes I liesalot!!!
... I will be back with more guano to feed your appetite!!
... no lies!
... I will continue to plague the world until the day U gets its filthy arse off this universe
... I will never be forgotten. Or so says satan.